Thursday, 18 April 2013

Some words I wrote in 2006 whilst trying to come to terms with the condition

Got to have another hit,
Just to get through
Along life’s  journey
I need get through

Anxiety plunges to a new depth
Skin creeps from my bones
So empty yet so full,
My life’s just started turning,
Oh dear lord how I’ve wept

Around the corner be there salvation
Balance for body and soul,
But I fear getting older
With the syringe as my salvation

Still, some say it could be worse,
You’re just having some troubles son!
Oh how I wish they could know
It’s this way or the hearse

I look to the future,
It’s no dead end
At peace with ones’ self.

To the future my friend!

Adrian Hawkins
21st August 2006

Is that the first flush or is it the heat?
Between pillar and post my conscience races
Do I hear the alarm or am I mistaken?
Temperature then rising with the explosion

The Panic sets in, I now feel the alarm
The march to victory the small ants begin
Through orifice and pore their feet march on
Engulfing my body, the cravings begun

Eyes open wide, fear no where to hide
Oh, those beautiful sugars passing my lips

Gravity increases, limbs feel like lead
Neurons lay idle, paralysed in the head
Sinews unable to complete their task
My true feelings a smile cannot mask

My temple no ant hill, for that has now passed
The day still runs on, but for me it’s all gone
To slumber and lethargy, with little parlay
Please God reinstall my motivation today

The all clear now sounded, but I’m not the best
Get back to work, but I need some rest
I retreat to my loved one, the day now complete
In solving sugars mystery, I will not be beat

Adrian Hawkins
August 2006

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